We were a little “eh, whatever” this year about Christmas, but when two big packages from Kali’s family arrived in the mail we were all ZOMG CHRISTMAS COOKIES!!!1!!!!1!! Nothing creates Holiday Cheer quite like a sugar rush.
So in the throes of cookie passion, we decided we were going to make this the BEST Christmas in a Florida RV park EVER. We immediately stocked up on egg nog and Southern Comfort and almond roca (your basic holiday staples), then gleefully bought a pack of discounted gaudy red velvet ribbons from the holiday reject table. One of them was obviously going to end up on Koa’s head, but what the heck were we going to do with the rest of them?
Why, decorate our Christmas tree, of course!
All the swanky RVs around here are sporting adorable mini Christmas trees on their dashboards, perfectly decorated and blinking tauntingly – albeit merrily – in our general direction. Some had the gall to put santa hats on their rearview mirrors, and one even went so far as to decorate their two cats in ribbons and put them in the window. REAL CAT DECORATIONS. These people are legit.
We’re cheap yet competitive, so we knew we had to lose the scrooge and scavenge some branches to put together our very own mini DIY Christmas tree. We made this decision on the fly while out and about in Tampa, eating a cuban sandwich and preparing to crash a Victorian Christmas Stroll. We couldn’t find any live pine trees, though, and all we could misappropriate from the tree lot was a handful of pine needles before they ran us out, so we had to get creative.
Turns out it’s really hard to steal palm fronds.
There’s this great tradition on Kali’s side of the family where you HIDE everyone’s gifts, instead of putting them under the tree like every other Christmas-celebrating family probably does. So instead of opening the intended gift, you open a package that has a used book or a rock and a slip of paper in it… and on that slip of paper is The Most Obscure Clue Ever.™
So anyways, Kali woke up this morning and opened the cereal box for breakfast and was like ARE YOU SERIOUS WHERE IS MY RAISIN BRAN?? Also, what does this note mean? “sljgndlfkjngf.gmn.xHAHAHAxildjiljlknsdlfkdfnfx,!!!gurg”
The two of us decided not to exchange gifts this year, so as the loving and thoughtful partner I am I found a way to recreate a little family tradition for the holidays. Muahahahaha. No more raisin bran until you crack the code, dear. This is serious business.